As exciting ( and nerve wracking ) as it all is, I feel it's important to be realistic ... at this stage the chances of getting as far as ET ( egg transfer ) are slim and that's miles before getting a bfp! ( big fat positive pregnancy test result )
So how does it all work?
.... As someone who up until a few months ago had never given IVF a passing thought I've had to learn a lot in a short space of time. But what I've learn't is really incrediable. It's amazing to think only 20 years ago women didn't have this opportunity and with more and more women suffering from infertility these days it's fantastic that something like IVF exists at all.
I do get a bit cross with people acting like IVF is a disease or infertility is an illness ... these days women who get pregnant just by dropping their knickers are the minority whereas women who struggle are the majority and yet we are labelled as odd and treated with sympathy. We are not ill thanks!
Worse are the awful people who ask 'when are you going to have another ... or when are you going to have children'. It's incrediably rude, I don't go around asking 'when are you going to lose weight, or when are you going to get your roots done'. I have some choice awnsers stored up for these people but don't think I'll ever be brave enough to use them! Worse are the people who say 'We only tried once and got pregnant, we got pregnant by accident, we weren't even trying' .... Grrrr .... just go away you insensitive thoughtless people!!!
The truth is IVF is incrediably common these days and I confidently predict that in twenty years time it will be the norm in terms of the favoured method of conception. The other week I was chatting iwth a friend who had two lovely little children and it turned out she'd had fertility treatment for both. The point is people just don't talk about it at dinner parties etc but I'd be very suprised if you didn't know several people who have suffered from fertility issues.
At the moment I veer towards panic and excitement that I am able to have a go at this amazing procedure. I've been told that there is nothing so amazing as seeing your 'baby' at cell stage, something you never get to do with a natural pregnancy.
BUT.... to get back to my point .... How does IVF work ?.....
In short, I take a lot of horrible drugs, inject myself, bloat up, become moody and hormonal and probably mess up my overactive thyroid meds while hubby doesn't have to do much at all ... then I go for scans everyday to chart the growth of my eggs.
Basically I'll be injecting stimms ... ( hormone stimulants ) which should make me grow approx 20 eggs on the chosen cycle rather than one ... ( no wonder I'll be moody! ) The thing is I might not grow 20 eggs, my eggs may not do well or horror of horrors I can over stim and they'll mature before the clinic gets a chance to get them out.
If we do get enough eggs and they are okay for egg collection then we do EC and hubby makes his deposit. Now comes the scientific bit ... if hubby has enough strong swimmers they'll swish them around in a testube with my good eggs and hopefully some will fertilise. Then you go away and have a sleepless night and wait to see if any have fertilised and if those which have are dividing ( cells ) in the right way.
Even someone with a good number of eggs might only end up with one or two that fertilise. And ... ideally you want enough to pop two back in and two in the freezer!
So ... then they grade them and a day or two later ( if you are lucky ) you go back for ET and hope you get two back in that are looking like they could be healthy embrio's and hopefully a couple more become frosties ( frozen eggs! ) ... ideally then if this cycle doesn't work you can have FET ( Frozen Egg Transfer )
Oh and don't forget if you go privately like we are this all costs a small fortune which counts for nothing if you end up with a BFN and if your cycle is cancelled mid way through I presume you lose the money already spent .....
We've got lots of things counting against us ...
* at 37 I'm at the wrong end of the success rate ... at 37 it's actually okay but at 38 your chances drop dramatically.
* Then there's my overactive thryoid which could be affected by the stimms. So if that goes out of sorts then we'd have to cancel the cycle as if I did get a BFP with my thyroid not under control then it can lead to miscarriage.
*Then there's hubby's migraines, kidney stones and ulcers which mean he's on a cocktail of pills which aren't great for fertility
* ...and oh and did I mention that during EC and ET I have to basically stay in bed which is hard with a toddler to look after
* ...and IF you get past all that you face the joys of the 2ww otherwise known as the two week wait, when you basically wait for the BFP or your period, all the while popping hormones that make you feel all over the place ... lovely can't wait for that bit!
It's all about PMA apparently... positive mental attitude ... So the above is the very LAST time I am going to have negative thoughts! My PMA is all about telling myself daily that the IVF will not only work but that I'll have twins! Ha ha, okay we can't afford twins and would have to move house, get a new car, give up my life for 2 years etc ... but hey if it works then I'd def be overjoyed with literally two for the price of one!!
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